because my soul is not a raisin 

faithful love and fear

One Pesach, the Kedushas Levi made a request from his shamash, get me some Turkish tobacco. At the time Russia was at war with Turkey and Turkish tobacco was contraband, that if found by the authorities an extremely severe punishment would be given. The Kedushas Levi's servant was bewildered by the request, why would the Rebbe want Turkish tobacco? But that was what he wanted, so he faithfully left the shul to seek out the contraband. Almost immediately, he returned with the tobacco. The Rebbe asked, is it so easy to get? The shamash said, if a Yid wants Turkish tobacco, it's very easy to purchase on the black-market.

Then the Reb Levi Yiztchak requested, to the shock of all those around him, go to one of the Yidden and get me some chametz. It's Pesach, Rebbe, where are we going to find chametz, asked the confused servant. Nonetheless, since the Rebbe asked, the faithful shamash began searching for chametz from the Yidden. Hours later he returned empty handed.

The Kedushas Levi called out, Ribbono shel Olam, look how easy it is to get contraband, despite the possibility of a terrible punishment from the government; but you commanded the Yidden to get rid of their chametz and none is to be found! HaKadosh Baruch Hu, the Yidden love and fear you so much!

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freedom, for what?

Rav Zilverberg told this over last year before Pesach. An elderly Jew of Jerusalem had suffered much in life. He was poor and had nothing. His wife was sick and crazy, and they had no children.

There were some yeshiva students who heard about his situation and decided to help out before Pesach. They went to his apartment and did all the cleaning. They raised money and bought everything that was needed for the holiday. After cleaning and organizing the apartment, they set a beautiful table.

Finally when they were finished on erev Pesach, they took some much needed rest. When they returned, they found the apartment turned over. This man's wife destroyed all of the Pesach preparations. They looked to the old man not knowing what to say.

His face was shining with a wondrous light and he began describing a seder of a grandfather sitting around a table with children and grandchildren. At length he spoke of the beauty of the table and the seder and how beautiful everything was. And then he said, so you think that is freedom?!? The person I am describing is enslaved to children, grandchildren, to a beautiful table cloth, silver, matzos, and wine.

Real freedom is a Jew who might not have any of those things. Not children, not grandchildren, not a table, not a penny, no food, no matzos, no wine. But nonetheless, he is happy with Hashem. That is what it means to be free: to be happy and joyful in Hashem! And he began to dance! I have you Hashem! That is what it means to be free.

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don't be an imitation

Once the Satmar Rav was at a wedding where a badchan was entertaining. The badchan asked the Rebbe if he could do an impersonation of him and he gave permission. So the badchan started imitating the Satmar Rav's davening (who had a unique way of praying) and everyone was laughing.

But soon, the Satmar Rav started to cry and the whole place went silent. The badchan stopped and ran over to him to ask for forgiveness. Reb Yoel said to him, I'm not upset with you; but you did such a good job imitating me, I began to think that I'm also only an imitation.

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some things are better left unsaid

Reb Yitzchak Vorker and Rav Menachem Mendel of Kotzk were the best of friends. Even after they became the rebbeim of different towns they still kept in touch. In fact, every week, there was one special Jew, a chosid of Rav Yitzchak Vorker, whose job it was to deliver letters between the Kotzker and Reb Yitzchok every Friday. He would start out at his rebbe's home Friday morning to pick up his letter for the Kotzker. Then he would walk for several hours through the forest to the Kotzker. There, he would deliver the letter to the Kotzker who would go into his room, read the letter and then write a reply letter. The man would wait for him to finish and then bring the letter back to his rebbe, Rav Yitzchak Vorker.

This man felt privileged to do his job and carried it out faithfully every week for many years. During that whole time, he never dared to open one of the letters and violate the intimate bond between the two Tzadikim.

However, one Friday morning, after the man had left Vorka with his rebbe's letter, his was struck with a bizzare yetzer hara. He felt compelled to open the letter and read what the Tzadik wrote to his lifelong friend...

He carefully opened the letter, so that he would be able to close it again without the Kotzker being able to tell that it had been opened. When he did, he was shocked to see what was on the paper... Nothing!

read the rest of the story at dixieyid.blogspot.com
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internalizing the message

The Kotzker Rebbe said this about himself: When I was a youngster, my teacher used to tell many, many stories of the previous generations. He told the stories and I listened. I endeavored to allow those stories to penetrate deep within my heart where they were able to make an indelible impression; an impression which influences me no less today, many years later.
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help is at hand

The holy Rizhiner lived in a palace and people would come from all over to speak to him and get advice. The Rebbe also had very special children; one of his sons was Dovid Moshe, who was a Rebbe in training. After cheder he would go to the busy court of his father and talk to people. Everyone would have to wait for a long time to speak to the Rebbe and they would pour their hearts out to the little boy.

There was a Yid whose wife was sick, who didn't have any parnasah, and couldn't marry off his daughter; he was suffering. All the time that he was waiting for the Rebbe he spoke to little Dovid Moshe and Dovid Moshe was giving him chizuk. He told him what to say when he spoke to his father: When its your turn and you get into to the Rebbe, tell him everything, about your wife, daughter, parnasah, exactly what is hurting you.

Finally it was this Yid's turn and he goes in; and he comes out two minutes later. Dovid Moshe asked him, did you tell him everything? Yes. And what did he say the Rebbe say? He said der Abishter vett helfen, may God help you. And then what happened? I don't know, his assistant pulled me out and here I am. Little Dovid Moshe said, that's not good enough, you have to go back; what's going to be, what are you supposed to do now?

So the Yid had to wait another week and little Dovid Moshe told him: this time don't leave until you have an answer. Finally the Yid goes in and he comes out in 30 seconds. Dovid Moshe asked him, did you tell him everything? Yes. And what did my father say? He said der Abishter vett helfen. And did you ask him what you are supposed to do until God helps you? Yes. And what did he say? He gave me a bruchah that the Abishter should help until the day that He helps.

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don't stop believing!

The Kedushas Levi once told all the Jews of Berditchov to gather together one Tuesday afternoon. Everyone was afraid that there must be something terribly that was going to happen, maybe the Rebbe knew that a pogrom was expected. So at the appointed time, everyone was in shul and the place was packed. The Kedushas Levi came in with a tallis over his head and he went up to the bima. He was quiet and the crowd was silent, nervous, and the silence was deafening as they waited. After a few minutes the Rebbe gave a klop on the bima and called out in a loud voice "Yidden, don't forget that God exists!".
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the source of life

 

One cold Ukrainian winter the Baal Shem Tov told some of his chassidim to prepare for a journey. The carriage was sent for and off they went. The chassidim never knew the destination of a trip but they noticed they were nearing a lake.

The lake was frozen over and the peasants were ice skating. It seems that it was a custom then that during their holidays they would etch crosses into the ice. The chassidim did not want the Rebbe to see this so they attempted to divert the carriage away from the lake. Despite their protests the Besht insisted that he wanted to see what was going on at the lake.

When they got there the Besht got out and watched the peasants skating and etching the crosses. This must have been the purpose of their journey because when the Rebbe got back into the carriage he told the driver to take them home. Of course the chassidim were waiting to understand what there is to learn from peasants skating crosses in the ice.

The Baal Shem Tov said to them that water is the source of all blessing; everything alive grows from water. But this is true only when the water is warm and flowing, then it is alive and a source of life.

However, when it gets cold, water will freeze and crosses can be etched into the ice. The source of life needs to be warm and flowing. Be careful of coldness, when there is a "winter" in life there is a danger that kedushah will be transformed into tumah.

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perfect planning

I don't follow the news, but this was hard to miss. It seem to me that these events are a reflection of the diffult times we are living in. As always, our response should be to strenghen our emunah somehow. I heard the following story this Shabbos.

Once the Besht was discussing parshas Mishpatim with his student Dov Bear (the future Maggid).  The Baal Shem was explaining that the mishpatim are also an expression of Hashem's will.  Reb Dov Bear expression his confusion about this, how could logicaly based laws of civil jurisprudence, that humanity would derive independent of the revelation at Sinai, be expressions of Gods infinite will?  A good question, so the Besht told his student to go to a certain place, sit down and see what transpires.  One condition: don't involve yourself, whatever happens.

So Reb Dov Bear went to where he was told to go.  It was far off, next to an obsure swimming hole near a road.  He sat next to a tree where no one could see him.  Soon enough someone showed up to take a dip, a rich man thinking he was alone, he went swimming and returned to his carraige. Unknowingly, he left his wallet, which was full of money.  Reb Dov Bear wanted to call out and tell him but he remembered his promise to his teacher.

Afterwards, someone else came to jump in the water. He found the money which had no indetification marks; no one was to be seen anywhere, so he toos the wallet. Of course Reb Dov Bear wanted to intercede and tell the man whose money it was but he had made a promise to his teacher.

Again, another man came to take a swim and while he was there the rich man returned with a servant looking for his money which they could not find.  They saw the lone swimmer and assumed that he stole the money, they accused him and in response to his denials they beat him up. Reb Dov Bear witness the entire event but because of his promise, he could not do anything to help out. He returned to the Besht utterly confused.

The Baal Shem Tov told him that, in a previous life, the rich man and the one who found the wallet were litigants in a dispute over money. The judge ruled for the rich man but his reasoning was incorrect. So justice was done, the rich man lost exactly what he should have previously, and the other man found what was justly his. But what about the third man, the one who got beat up, asked Reb Dov Bear? The Besht answered, oh him, he was the judge.

The gemarah in Makos 10b, also says something similar to this, in the name of Rabbi Shimon ben Lakish. One person murders inadvertently and another intentionally and there are no witnesses to both events. So Hashem sends them to the same place, and the intentional murderer is killed inadvertently by the (previous) inadvertent killer in the front of witnesses (sending him to exile). Both get what they deserve. Point is, Hashem's justice is perfect, we just don't (and can't) understand the big picture.

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it's good to be bothered

 

Once someone went to the Kotzker bothered by doubts in faith. The Rebbe said, "Nu, so you have sfeikos in emunah."
"But I am sometimes not sure of the existence of Hashem, " the man said. 
"Nu, the Rebbe said, "so you are not sure of the existence of Hashem."
"But if Hashem does not exist, then the whole world is hefker," the man said.
"Nu", the Rebbe said, "so the whole world is hefker."
"But the thought that the whole world is hefker is very tormenting and disturbs my sleep," the man said.
"If the thought that the whole world is hefker does not let you sleep, then you are a real maamin," the Rebbe said.

The real problem is only when it does not bother you. 

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